Looking Thru the Clouds

Some days like today, I struggle. I struggle with the right frame of mind, the right thinking, saying the right things. Days like today, it seems that no matter what I do or say....it is taken wrong, or comes out wrong, or just is wrong. And the more I try to fix it or defend myself, the worse it gets. It makes me want to just shrink into a corner and disappear. I tried writing here earlier this morning and have since deleted the post.  It was not bad or offensive, but revealed my recognition of my frame of mind that I let something very silly bother me and that I shouldn't have let it. It revealed that I recognized my need to stop and start over with the day...kinda like I am doing now. I feel I need to write something here that is encouraging, something inspirational, something that will help someone else which usually helps me help myself, and this morning I recognized that my perspective was askew but had already set something in motion that I tried to stop but for some reason took on a life of its own. I didn't and still don't know what to do about it.  Since then I have been very quiet and don't want to talk to anyone. Words have escaped me today and I feel very small. I take things very personally and very much to heart and therefore probably am very easily wounded. Sometimes I take things in the wrong way probably much in the same way that I am taken the wrong way. I never mean any malice towards anyone nor would ever in a million years want to hurt someone.  I should stop talking now too.  Anyway. I know that the clouds will pass and the sun is peeking thru.  I know tomorrow is a new day. I just wish some days we could have do-overs and erase the day and the things said that did not go so well. So, I will go to bed tonight and hope sleep will come and replace the tears. And it would be nice if my mind wouldn't keep replaying everything I've done or said wrong, which only weakens any self-confidence or worth. Its no one else's fault. I know it's mine and I own up to it or at least my part of it. I blame no one else. That is not my nature to do so. I can only take responsibility for me. That is what is required of me. And I look forward to better days......